6.

So here we are. In a whirlwind of emotions and not knowing what to do. I didn't talk to you for about 9 hours yesterday which is rare for us. I did however talk to her. She told me things out of venting which in turn made me realize you are a liar. I wondered if you were feeding her bullshit as well as you were feeding me bullshit. Why is it SO hard to be honest? I am honest with you as much as I can be. Sometimes it's hard cause everything I say or do hurts your feelings. It's unfair. I just want the truth and sometimes I feel like you sugarcoat everything because you know I have been hurt many times before. I knew what I was getting myself into when we started this. So, do me a favor, don't do me ANY favors.

I am laying in my bed right now wanting to call you and text you while you are at work. I KNOW you are thinking of me too, but I know you are thinking of her more. That's why I had to tell you exactly how I felt last night. I had to make the right choice and not talking to you until you figure out you was probably the best choice I have made in about 3 months. I know it will hurt but I feel like I am in the way. Of everything. YOUR chocies. YOUR moves. I need to do me while you do you. I know you will get to a place where you are happy and I hope you call me when you do. Even if it's back with her. I just want my heart to be ok just like I want YOURS to be ok as well.

I wont forget you. Or this. Or how we felt everytime we were together. The passion. The laughs. The fighting. Lol. We arent a couple yet we fight like one. I'll miss it. I feel like this could be the end. Im gonna hold my breath for a bit but not for long. I don't wanna sink while you use my head for balance to come up for air...if that makes sense...it does to me.

I'll be thinking of you. Ill try my hardest to stay strong love.

<3